All Hail the Anniversary

It occurs to me that on this date a year ago I took my preliminary exam. Goodness, all the stress and wailing and crying that went up to this date . . . And it was over in 2 hours with everyone chatting and smiling. No fanfare, no humiliation. It was just DONE.

And here I am a year later, and there is still stress and wailing and crying but it’s because of trying to plan some sort of huge wedding. I have developed the suspicion that if there is NOT something dramatic in my life, I create it. It’s been a weird year. A crucible year. I’ve finally had to confront the idea that I’ve been numbing myself with comics and TV and food and shopping because I’ve been avoiding confronting my career and what I really need from it. That on some level I won’t let myself get control of my life because I’m addicted to the stress and the drama. What else have I known in my life as a student? But now we’re getting to the point where you simultaneously need to become more serious and more silly. I’ll soon be on the downward slope of my 20’s, and I don’t want to leave them feeling like I spazzed out the ENTIRE time (just some of it, because that is who I am).

So here I am, anniversary of the prelim. Tomorrow is the anniversary of Andy asking me to marry him, and that’s a happy one too!

Oh, and HARRY POTTER TONIGHT!!!!!!