Ok, I’m breathing
Imagine me sitting in a rocking chair with a blanket over my legs, while my caretaker leans over to you and says “yesterday was not one of her ‘good days’.”
Actually, the daytime of yesterday was pretty good. I slept in a bit, drank coffee. Did a fair amount of work at lab. But all the sudden it was 6PM and the pool at the apartment was too crowded with screeching children (and I actually really like children, so WTF?). I got really snippy and generally cranky. I think maybe I just needed a damn nap, but didn’t want to give up my remaining weekend. It was just one of those evenings when you feel there is far too much to do and keep track of and you end up just panicking. How will any of it get done? Andy tells me that he used to do the same thing, and after awhile he noticed that when he just let it go till the last minute, it still turned out just fine. And THAT is a lesson I’m still learning.
I’m thankful that whatever anxiety I have is not in the disorder range. Right now is a special, crazy time. But ugh, there are so many things floating around.
On the bright side, I think Roger had a very enjoyable birthday this Friday, so that makes me happy. Despite whatever spaziness I may contain within myself, I’m glad it may not interfere with my ability to keep friends. My birthday is at the end of the month, and it is a little weird that it’s 26. It’s a kindof “eh” year. I think it may be a more low-key birthday with all the other stuff going on. And that is really OK with me.
Completely unrelated tangent: man, all these bridal magazines seem to think I should be getting heaps of spa treatments right now. Massages, manicures, waxing. . . . I wish I had the money for all that, especially a massage. I DID get some damn fine makeup at the M.A.C. counter, so at least I should photograph well ?
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